Part of my self-discovery through working with Stacey Martino is that I lost my bliss somewhere along the way to becoming a wife and mother. I stopped doing the activities that filled my soul, that helped me cope with negative thoughts, that gave me an outlet for my creative and radiant energy.
Stacey teaches her students to measure how they are feeling on a scale of 1 to 100 percent. When you feeling at the 50 percent line and below, you are feeling pretty bad and any decisions you make are skewed by this poor state. In fact, it is impossible to make a good decision from a position of poor state. But when you feeling above the 50 percent line, you are able to make decisions from a better, more attuned place of heartfelt understanding.
When women get married and become a mom, we far too easily put our own identities on a shelf and assume a new identity of wife and mother. But to be truly happy, we must reconnect to those activities, feelings, and thoughts that help us connect to ALL of ourselves, our FULL identity. For some, this many mean returning to art or music or theater or a high-powered corporate job. For me, this meant returning to dance and to a spiritual form of yoga called kundalini yoga.
To have better relationships, I first needed to have a solid relationship with myself. I realized that I needed to carve out the time and space to connect with my soul and spirit. I love being a mom and a wife but those roles do not define me. I am so much more and need time and space to express myself and my feminine energy. Reconnecting with my feminine energy has helped me with every area of my life. I no longer feel as burned out when relating to my spouse and my children because I have cultivated my feminine energy that is attuned to being open and vulnerable within these spheres of influence. Operating from a masculine energy when you are a feminine core energy is exhausting and deprives the soul of the feminine nourishment that it requires. By reconnecting with my feminine energy through dance and kundalini yoga, I have been able to nourish my body and soul and to really feel fulfilled in terms of expression.
If you are a women who is feeling burned out on life, I heartily encourage you to reflect on what you have given up to assume the roles you are currently in. What activities do you long for? Painting? Poetry? More time in nature? Whatever it is, you must prioritize your life so that you can fit more of that into you life. This may require creativity or the expense of hiring help to assist with other responsibilities. Whatever it may be, though, the spiritual and energetic payoff will be worth it. I promise you.